I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
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