we made out on top of his cat.
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
Randomize
