no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship