it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
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