I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
Randomize
