how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead