i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
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