I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
Randomize
