This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
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