Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
How's the hangover?
I've been begging my dog to mercy kill me for over an hour. He has this look like he might do it, you know, as my best friend should.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize
