Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
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