I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
Randomize
