He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
Randomize
