I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize
