If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
Randomize
