i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
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