Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Three words: puerto rican gang bang
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
It's shark week go big or go home
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
Randomize
