# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
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