yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
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