I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
Randomize
