Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize