my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
i would punch a child for taco bell
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
Randomize
