that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
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