My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize
