I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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