guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
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