Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
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