seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
I'm really busy with my period
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