What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Someone shattered a urinal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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