Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
Randomize
