In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
And I swear to god I'll divorce you if you so much as say a single sentence in Yoda talk in our bedroom. I may be a nerd but that's just fucking creepy
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
Randomize
