I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize
