Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
Randomize
