But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
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