whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
Randomize
