I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize
