We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
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