Imagine two people making love on top of a unicorn . . . my life is the opposite of that.
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize