I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
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