I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS