It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
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