it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
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