i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
