i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
Terrible idea I love it
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
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