Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
Randomize
