Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
Randomize
