So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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