if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
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