I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
Randomize