My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
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