Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
