I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize
