Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
Randomize